Weird Dreams

Usually after a particularly emotional session like yesterday, where I spend more time mentally out of session than in it, I have a weird or unusual dream.

I’ve never really tried remembering them long term but I wonder if they mean anything or have any significance. They usually stay with me a while after I wake up and then I suddenly am like “oh crap, that never happened” like half way through the day. They seem so real. I’ve tried to pick fights with my fiancĂ© over things I’ve dreamt about and he has no idea what I’m going on about, poor soul. It is at the point now where I will go “did this happen, or did I dream it?” to get an idea or gauge of where I should be on the emotionally reactive spectrum.  

In this dream, I was out at a public festival of some sorts. And I was walking along and there was this dog begging for attention from its owners. It was little and scruffy and kind of adorable in a ruffian sort of way. But they were just ignoring it. Like it needed them and they were ignoring it.

So I took the dog. I stole the dog. And nobody noticed. 

And he loved me. I had him for a few weeks in the dream. And then, the guilt came. I had taken someone else’s property. So I called the number on the tag and when the family didn’t answer it auto forwarded to the police – who came to take my statement. 

And instead of telling them the truth I lied about where I found the dog and that it was lost and abandoned. Painting myself as the good citizen for rescuing him instead of the criminal for stealing him. 

I got caught in the lie. And then I woke up. 

I have my own ideas about where some of that comes from, but I’m curious as to your thoughts. Do you ever dream after a particularly intense session? 

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8 thoughts on “Weird Dreams

  1. Yes. I have very interesting dreams anyway, but had a series of nightmares after I started discussing my childhood with my therapist. Up until then I’d thought had some bits that weren’t great, but it was overall ok. The sessions were really hard, I couldn’t get the words out for fear of being punished for telling and making my mum look bad (she’s been dead for 15 years, so that’s pretty unlikely).

    The nightmares were all around the theme of been punished for telling: one involved an attack on my therapist’s family, one was an epic saga where I was going to be falsely diagnosed as psychotic and involuntarily hospitalised and was set in a train that was a school and I was in with the primary school students, and one where I went on holiday and the B&B I stayed at turned into a therapy session with a woman who told me that my therapist had handed me over to her, and showed as proof a bath towel sized letter written on clear plastic.

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    • Wow, those are intense. It can be so wearing. I used to have the same fear when I started therapy about my mom finding out I was talking about her. My fear was guilt based but still fear. It can be so terrifying. I hope you’ve made it to a place where you aren’t haunted by that thought of that punishment any more

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      • Getting there. It’s always more of a problem the first time I talk about something, and as I’ve just changed therapists my getting her up to date hasn’t involved covering any new ground. Plus we’re currently focussing on emotion regulation, symptom management etc before we get into any traumatic stuff. The new therapist is very easy to talk to, which is good.

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  2. I have weird dreams prior to my sessions. I had one 2 nights ago and I’m headed to therapy in 30 min. I think because of the EMDR and the flood of information, along with a new part, it’s a way my mind is telling me what is happening. My therapist does a fantastic job of breaking down my dreams to make sense. She believes they all connect in some way. Maybe journal the dream and as you get information during the day or at night, write it down. Have you processed them in therapy? Thanks for this post…gives me a little more courage to go talk about mine today.

    Liked by 1 person

    • I should journal them. I haven’t really talked about them with A yet, but I definitely should bring it up. I’m pretty sure I know what this one is telling me.

      Also, you are most welcome. Thank you for reading and commenting

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  3. That is so interesting PD. I tend to have dreams before sessions, really stressful dreams but I never can quite remember what all happens in them. Sometimes I’ve had so many imagined conversations (and unsent emails) with Elle that I can’t remember what I’ve actually told her or not. It gets very confusing. I tend to believe if the dream has meaning to you then that is what it means…. kind of pragmatic in my approach to dreams 🙂

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