That they tell you absolutely not to do. That thing that if any of you did it I would be writing furiously in the comments encouraging you to reconsider and do it the right way.
I’ve quit my depression meds cold turkey.
BEFORE you all start yelling at me in the comments and telling me that this is the worst idea ever and #pdplzreconsider here is how it happened.
First, Friday was my last dose, and I was like “I’ll just go to the clinic on Saturday.” Well, thanks to the holiday weekend – clinic is closed until tomorrow. So this was not a deliberate throwing out of the pills. I ran out. Normally in this case I would go to the pharmacy and ask them for a weeks supply until I could get to the clinic to see the doctor. Pharmacy is also closed for three days.
So really, I ended up in a situation where unless I wanted to wait for a million hours at the hospital, I had to wait anyways.
Second, I have been on the lowest dose of this medication for over 2 years. Weaning would look like 1/2 a pill each day for a few weeks and then I’d be off anyways. When you’re already on less than 20mg of something, it’s pretty hard to go much smaller. So I’m not going from 60 or 80 or 100 to zero.
Finally, I feel fantastic. I have not felt this good in a long time. Maybe some of it is mental, maybe it’s the long weekend, maybe it’s my diet change or the skills I have in place – but I’m getting no brain zaps, I’m not lethargic, I’m hungry, I have a sex drive – it feels like my body is waking up. Additionally with the reframed diagnosis of C-PTSD, it’s likely that my depression was a side effect of the PTSD and not necessarily caused by a chemical imbalance in the first place.
Regardless, I am on the lookout for signs that I need to go back on, and I promise that I’m on my way to the hospital or clinic as SOON as one appears.
But in the meantime I’m feeling pretty decent and I’m kind of really happy about that (and yes, I know it’s only been 3 days).